Mikey's Hook-Up

What Would You Buy for $9,900?

mikey — Mon, 12 Jul 2010 16:03:51 +0000

Making decisions is pretty tough, especially for audiophiles. Say you’re at The Stereo Exchange in Manhattan, and you happen upon a sweet, once-in-a-lifetime deal on some premium XLR cables:

Now, everyone loves carbon fiber and weird bulges. We really want these cables, even at the price. But we here at the Hookup are big advocates of deferring to the experts, so to help us decide whether or not these cables are a savvy purchase, we consulted with professional shopper Chris Jakubowski. Chris is best known as the former personal shopper of celeb Sarah Jessica Parker, and many consider him to have invented the phrase, “you GO, girl!”

“Like, OMG,” Chris exclaimed upon seeing the photo from our tipster, “those cables! That price! Yucky! Didn’t you know you can get 2 perfectly adequate XLR cables for just $13 each at Mikey’s Hookup?! And then you have so much extra money for really fabulous purchases!” We asked Jakubowski what some great purchases would be. We naturally first thought of a set of Dayton Rims and a couple more gold teeth in our grill, but Jakubowski suggested we troll eBay for some even sweeter deals. We found a few.

So, as it turns out, after buying a pair of XLR cables at Mikey’s, with the difference we could still afford all of the following:

1. A vintage Vespa, with sidecar, for $2500
2. An medieval armo(u)r suit, for $2241
3. A G3 iMac, for $155
4. A pretty “legit” “gangsta ice chain” for $44
5. A Hobart deli slicer, $1200
6. A hot/cold buffet serving range, for $650
7. An ice cream bar vending machine, for $1199
8. An iPod Nano custom engraved to read “Insane Clown Posse Juggalo 4 Lyfe”, $150
9. Night vision goggles, $580
10. A snowmobile, for $1100
And still have enough for a Peter Luger burger, with trimmings, $14.

Oh, snip! You had us from “deli slicer” (Jakubowski repeatedly informed us that “Jerry MacGuire” is his favorite film). So, clearly, the choice is yours. You can pay way too much elsewhere for cables of dubious benefit, or come to Mikey’s and save some money for the other things you love.

Lacie Rugged and G-Raid sittin in a tree, K-I-S-S-I-N-G

mikey — Fri, 09 Jul 2010 17:41:23 +0000

Woke up this morning with a flash card reader, magsafe and a bottle of Wild Turkey

mikey — Thu, 27 May 2010 22:18:51 +0000

My g4 powerbook can run circles around your silly i7. Pffft

mikey — Tue, 11 May 2010 18:20:13 +0000

Customer of the Year, 2010 Edition

mikey — Mon, 10 May 2010 13:42:46 +0000

I know what you’re thinking: “How can these clowns,” you think to yourself, “declare the coveted Mikey’s Hookup Customer of the Year award recipient so early into the year? You haven’t even seen my Phil Schiller costume!” Well, we hired some professionally-trained method actors to re-enact the events that compelled us to make the bold declaration. I think you’ll agree that this guy rules, despite being “totes aggro,” in the words of Hookup staffer Chris.

Consider the bar officially raised.

P.S. The real guy didn’t laugh at the end.

iPad Review EXTREME Pitted Edition

mikey — Sun, 09 May 2010 23:22:06 +0000

We tried to do a really comprehensive, in-depth iPad review, but…well, no more Mountain Dew at work. Mini P.K. Ripper by Flick Trix.

Snack Break

mikey — Sun, 25 Apr 2010 23:26:21 +0000

“Hey, Hookup,” people always ask us, “how do you remember so much Mac stuff?” The answer is simple. This proprietary confection created in Apple’s secret labs but manufactured in Hawaii boosts Apple product knowledge by 300% per piece. Steve Jobs pops one before every keynote.

Save $50 off your next Apple computer. Ask us how. I triple dog dare ya

mikey — Sun, 25 Apr 2010 19:37:38 +0000

Three rolls of gaffers tape and two iPads = love

mikey — Mon, 19 Apr 2010 14:50:42 +0000

A Weekend in Numbers

mikey — Mon, 19 Apr 2010 14:10:19 +0000

Sheesh, this weekend has been zany as can be. It could take forever to process all the datum, so I’ll give you 10 essentials, expressed numerically:

1. Number of blocks of ice containing video game trial versions smashed by Hookup staffers during the weekend: 2 (Lost Planet 2, in case you’re curious)
2. Number of video game trial versions in a PS3 version package containing XBox-only download codes: 1

3. Percentage of total customers that have asked one of our opinions of the iPad and then proceeded to argue with it: ~40%

4. Number of boxes of Entemann’s donuts purchased and consumed: 3

5. Number of hookup staffers who have claimed the title of “Harbor Master:” 2

6. Number of Brooklyn residents who connected their TV’s to their Macs: 3,200 (figure is approximate)
7. Percentage of askers who have not believed us that there is no such thing as a FireWire to USB converter dongle: 100%

8. Number of oatmeal cookies received with returns as stipulated by receipt: 0
9. Number of “customers” just coming to Hookup DUMBO to check facebook on display computers: 114

10. Number of people whom have mistaken Mikey for Seth Green: 2