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Customer of the Year, 2010 Edition

Monday, May 10th, 2010

I know what you’re thinking: “How can these clowns,” you think to yourself, “declare the coveted Mikey’s Hookup Customer of the Year award recipient so early into the year? You haven’t even seen my Phil Schiller costume!” Well, we hired some professionally-trained method actors to re-enact the events that compelled us to make the bold declaration. I think you’ll agree that this guy rules, despite being “totes aggro,” in the words of Hookup staffer Chris.

Consider the bar officially raised.

P.S. The real guy didn’t laugh at the end.

iPad Review EXTREME Pitted Edition

Monday, May 10th, 2010

We tried to do a really comprehensive, in-depth iPad review, but…well, no more Mountain Dew at work. Mini P.K. Ripper by Flick Trix.

Snack Break

Monday, April 26th, 2010

“Hey, Hookup,” people always ask us, “how do you remember so much Mac stuff?” The answer is simple. This proprietary confection created in Apple’s secret labs but manufactured in Hawaii boosts Apple product knowledge by 300% per piece. Steve Jobs pops one before every keynote.

A Weekend in Numbers

Monday, April 19th, 2010

Sheesh, this weekend has been zany as can be. It could take forever to process all the datum, so I’ll give you 10 essentials, expressed numerically:

1. Number of blocks of ice containing video game trial versions smashed by Hookup staffers during the weekend: 2 (Lost Planet 2, in case you’re curious)
2. Number of video game trial versions in a PS3 version package containing XBox-only download codes: 1

3. Percentage of total customers that have asked one of our opinions of the iPad and then proceeded to argue with it: ~40%

4. Number of boxes of Entemann’s donuts purchased and consumed: 3

5. Number of hookup staffers who have claimed the title of “Harbor Master:” 2

6. Number of Brooklyn residents who connected their TV’s to their Macs: 3,200 (figure is approximate)
7. Percentage of askers who have not believed us that there is no such thing as a FireWire to USB converter dongle: 100%

8. Number of oatmeal cookies received with returns as stipulated by receipt: 0
9. Number of “customers” just coming to Hookup DUMBO to check facebook on display computers: 114

10. Number of people whom have mistaken Mikey for Seth Green: 2

Valentine’s Paranormal Saga Ends in Mystery, Knee-length Skirt

Sunday, February 21st, 2010

Brooklyn, NY, USA — Today an uncertain ending to a love triangle decades in the making unfolded in front of Mikey’s Hookup, a Brooklyn electronics retailer. The key players, pop songbird Lady Gaga and Sherpa/respected paranormal researcher Nawang Tashi have converged on this spot after tracing a mysterious presence since 1984. Both, unbeknownst to the other, believed themselves to be on the trail of a fearsome, mythical yeti. Tashi’s reasons for pursuing the purported beast were scientific but with a splash of vengeance–the beast consumed his entire family and their prized alpaca in the dead of the night. Gaga’s reasons for the pursuit were purely carnal. She wanted a kiss from a yeti. And who can blame her? The kiss of the yeti is said to bring wealth and luck to it’s recipient, along with imprinting the brain with a map to some leprechaun gold. “I’m totes gonna get that smooch, holla’!!” wrote Gaga in a recent diary entry (livejournal.com, post since removed).

Both had been following the trail of the beast via his copious droppings, and also asking around. Mostly the droppings, though. When the creature finished an intense game of Street Fighter II at Mikey’s Hookup (playing as Blanka, claim employees of the store), he stepped outside to find an ambush. Gaga stood there waiting with a choice yak steak and a comely smile, looking radiant in the lastest fashion from noted designer Christopher Jakubowski. The creature, at first intrigued, sniffed the air and then paused for a moment. “OH, HUZZAH!” came a cry from behind a fence, “AT LAST! I shall slay the foul beast and avenge my family, also SCIENCE!!” as Tashi menacingly waved a fearsome battle-ax. The yeti took off at a ferocious pace, disappearing into the snowy evening.

Nearly a week later, the whereabouts of the yeti are unknown, as are those of Gaga. She was last seen at a Talbot’s in Minneapolis signing the credit card receipt for the matronly clothing, “true love has changed me.” Chris Jakubowski could not be reached at press time for comment, his voicemail claiming he was “out being fabulous.”

R.I.P. Technics

Sunday, January 31st, 2010

Sad news today, we hear from our distributor that Technics will cease to be at the end of February. The rumors are true, the maker of the legendary SL-1200 and 1200 MK2 will be shutting down production within 30 days. 1200′s have already jumped up $50 in price in the last few months, as the supply becomes more scarce. There’s no telling where the prices could go in the next little bit, not only for new but for used models as well. This is a huge deal, as the Technics 1200 is widely (almost officially) regarded as the finest DJ turntable ever manufactured. It’s unchallenged 25+ year reign as the weapon of choice for DJs across all genres might be drawing to a close.

We’ve been selling them forever, and nearly every bar in Williamsburg, Brooklyn has a pair. Friday and Saturday nights around the time we’re closing (8PM), there’s often a few people rushing through the doors at the last possible minute to grab stylii, carts, etc. and if they know which model the decks at the bar are, they’re almost always 1200s. We’ll still be selling ‘em as long as we can get new ones at a reasonable price. Wish we could get these limited editions again, so fresh:

Magic Mice Restocked

Sunday, January 17th, 2010

Check out this mighty mouse pyramid with pillars made from the new Apple remotes. A fitting tribute to the power of the god Kukulcan. Hurry, these things sell out FAST.

Despite Lady Gaga, Mikey’s Hookup wins prestigious Apple Award

Sunday, December 27th, 2009

Throughout the course of human history, those in the know have chosen to bestow upon others recognition for supreme efforts in their field. The ancient Greek victors of games and battle were crowned with laurels and anointed with sacred oils. A few years later, the Heismann trophy was invented to recognize excellence in the game of football. The human intellect and excellence as a human being in general have also been honored via such awards as the Pulitzer and the Nobels. Excellence in the arts is recognized by such awards as the Grammys, Kennedy center honors, and induction into various halls of fame. But next to what we’re going to talk about today, all of these paltry recognitions recede into feebleness. Sorry, Lady Gaga, but your achievements are pretty lame in comparison.

Apple gives an award to it’s authorized repair centers for excellence in service and support. In 2008, we received the award in Quarter 3, but not Q4. Those of you that have been keeping track, and are worried about bringing in your machine here at the end of Q4 2009 need not worry. We got the award EVERY quarter of 2009, including the 4th. So, if your Apple computer is acting a little sluggish, feel free (and safe) to bring it on by. We’ve been excellent for a full year now. I know what you’re wondering–how can they have the award already when the quarter’s not over? Well…what are we, on trial here? You might also wonder why we didn’t get the award in Q4 2008. Well, not to point the finger at any particular individual (Gaga), but there was this one Lady employed at the Hookup as a certified Apple tech for 3 particular months of 2008. Hmmm

gaga_repair

…and it was tough for the other techs to concentrate with her “working” back there.

Award_web

We’re very proud to have been recognized for our excellent service for the entire year. Hats off to the Hookup Apple technicians. In 2010, our service is going to be so great that we get 2 awards per quarter! Just wait. Let’s see you try it, Gaga. Also, please return our Torx T6 screwdriver. We really miss it.

gaga_repair1

ULTIMATE SHOULDER

Tuesday, December 8th, 2009

Just when you think life is all fun ‘n’ games, something serious has to come along and sober you up. For example, local business owner Mikey Weiss noticed a sharp pain in the front of his shoulder when making full forehand slams (“hot swipes” in the parlance of the sport) in table tennis matches. This was quite troublesome for Mikey, who enjoys nothing more than the tears/supplications of a brutally savaged ping-pong opponent. After taking a few days off from distributing red-assed table tennis beatdowns, Mikey decided to consult a physician about the injury.

Sure enough, modern medicine deemed the injury to be analogous to tennis shoulder (and not “scaled-down,” either, as the uncouth might surmise). But that wasn’t all. X-rays revealed an even more complex facet to the pain Weiss experienced, as revealed by the leaked secret photo below:

cyborg_mikey

Yes. Mikey Weiss is a cyborg. Everyone that Mikey has slaughtered at ping-pong can feel at least a shred of their dignity restored, as his forehand is literally not humanly possible. He had a few upgrades and maintenance performed (8GB SD card, fresh Half-AA battery (the very same 3.6 volt variety as used in the PRAM of G5 and prior Power Macs), and we even used a little canned air on the terminals of his molex cable), and as soon as the sutures heal, he should be better than ever. No word yet on whether or not this will render him a soulless killing machine, but we’re just assuming that it will. You just gotta accept it, because you can’t outrun a machine.

terminator

High-quality iPhone Recording on the Cheap

Monday, November 16th, 2009

Lots of people use the iPhone to record voice memos, etc. but the included mic isn’t really optimal for anything much more high-fidelity than that. Companies such as Blue have released products such as the Mikey (no relation to local Frenchman Michel Le Weiss) to allow a higher-quality mic to be used with the iPhone. One of the Hookup staffers, Bobby, has been wanting a good way to use his iPhone as a recorder for interviews, ambient noise, etc., and wanted to use his favorite XLR mic to do it. He began scheming early in the morning and soon enough had begun to assemble a prototype, all made from standard components found here in the store. And thus was born this terrifying abomination of technology:

iPhone, a/v cable, RCA couplers, RCA "Y" cable, XLR Mic, magic

But, actually, it works great. The audio came out exceptionally clear, and the total cost, less mic, was a mere $32.00! Not bad. Works great for the “I Am T-Pain” app, too. I hear. Most importantly, good-quality recordings of really interesting and Nobel Prize-worthy thoughts can be captured straight off the domes of favorite coworkers.

interview

“So anyway, I says to him, I says…”